Sharing Our Why
I thought it was about time we share our why. Why are we adopting? Why international? Why Bulgaria? These are common questions so we wanted to take some time to break it down to you all.
It's no secret that our biological children did not necessarily come easily. We miscarried between Jackson and Sawyer and again between Sawyer and Isabel. Throughout those years, I (Angie) also dealt with some medical issues from a tumor in my sinuses to a kidney infection that landed me in the hospital. Ben and I felt peace in 2020 saying that we knew we were done having biological children.
Fast forward to the Fall of 2021 and I began to have a feeling of wanting another child. I brushed it off thinking it was just typical baby fever and it would pass. Fast forward again to the Spring of 2022...After time spent in prayer and in the word, I just couldn't shake the feeling. I felt God was calling us to have another child, but I knew we were done biologically. Ben and I talked about adoption back in our dating years and early in marriage, but we hadn’t talked about it in years. This was not a small feeling that was easily shaken so I finally decided to bring it up to Ben. Much to my surprise, Ben was not shocked by my idea to adopt and actually said he had been thinking the same thing, but wasn't sure how I'd feel. WOW! We were both in awe of how God was working in us personally and when we came together, we were already on the same page.
We decided to loop in our friends and family fairly early on as we were seeking wisdom for what adoption looked like for us. We didn't really know anyone who had adopted and didn't know too much about the process in general. We began attending all sorts of webinars and speaking with different agencies about the different paths we could take. We ultimatetly felt called to international adoption.
Once we chose our agency, we spent time looking into all the different country programs and praying about which would be the best fit for us. Our agency suggested Bulgaria for us and if I'm being completely transparent, I just shrugged it off. Bulgaria wasn't even on my radar. Ben was totally on board with it, but trusted God's process of getting me there. Eventually, I had an unexplainable moment of peace that I'll never forget. I was folding laundry and while I didn't hear God audibly, I felt so strongly He was telling me to go with Bulgaria. I hesitate to even share this part because I know some people will think it's crazy, but this is what happened. God so clearly wanted me to give up control here. He reminded me that this adoption wasn't my idea, but His and His plans are greater than anything I could come up with. It was such an exciting feeling I actually called Ben at work (something I hardly ever do) to tell him. He was so funny and just responded with "I was wondering when you'd come around!" That day will forever be engrained in my memory because it was such an overwhelming sense that God was calling us to adopt from Bulgaria.
God has moved mountains for us already and I can't wait to see what else He does as we move forward with this process.